MY PENIS IS THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM

MY PENIS NEVER HAD A BAD DAY IN HIS LIFE.

MY PENIS IS TOO BLESSED TO BE STRESSED.

MY PENIS IS ALL THE HOT DOG YOU'LL NEED AT THE COMPANY PICNIC.

ACTUARIAL TABLES REVEAL THAT MY PENIS IS AT GREAT RISK OF PENETRATING YOUR GIRLFRIEND'S HAIRY LIL' SNATCHEROO.

MY PENIS IS THE PAPAL BULL.

NUNS PRAY FOR MY PENIS.

MY PENIS IS A CAPTAIN OF INDUSTRY.

MY PENIS BRINGS HOME THE BACON

MY PENIS IS A VITAL PART OF THE WAR ON TERROR.

MY PENIS COMES ONLY IN ONE FLAVOR: HUGE.

YOUR EXIT INTERVIEW CONSISTS OF INTENSE SUCKING ON MY PENIS.

MY PENIS WAS THERE AT IWO JIMA.

NO SHIRT, NO SHOES, MY PENIS.

JOHN 3:16 SAYS, MY PENIS SO LOVED THE WORLD THAT IT GAVE ONE OF ITS THICK, HOT, AND SALTY BLASTS ALL OVER YOUR FACE.

MY PENIS IS A CAPTAIN OF INDUSTRY.